{"id":25187,"date":"2018-04-10T07:30:54","date_gmt":"2018-04-10T11:30:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/?p=25187"},"modified":"2018-04-10T07:30:54","modified_gmt":"2018-04-10T11:30:54","slug":"glom-on-mom-an-early-reader-for-parents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/?p=25187","title":{"rendered":"Glom on Mom: An Early Reader for Parents"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>This weekend, we had the cutest parade of little kids. Each was more adorable than the next,\u00a0wobbling\u00a0in with their flyaway hair and haphazard winter-into-spring clothing layers. And they were fabulously well-behaved at the bookstore, at least, until Mom and Dad\u00a0stepped over the invisible toddler patience line and lingered too long, chatting and browsing. Then\u00a0would come the tot meltdowns, which are also sort of heartbreakingly adorable,\u00a0at least when they are skillfully and\u00a0relatively quickly managed by parents. (I mean,\u00a0who doesn’t\u00a0feel like crying with outsized, totally inappropriate rage and exhaustion\u00a0while running\u00a0errands? But as adults, we’re supposed to have stopped doing that.)
\nI feel for parents who bring their toddlers shopping. We booksellers try, when we have a moment, to entertain and distract little ones long enough for the grownups to browse for a few minutes, but those bouts of peace are generally short-lived. One mom came in with twin two-year-olds and a six-year-old, looking for Dr. Seuss’s Hop on Pop<\/em>,\u00a0<\/em>and she looked so frazzled I wanted to wave a magic wand and give her a three-hour nap. “I long for the time when my body is my own again,” she said. “Someone is always hanging on me.” She immediately looked guilty for saying it, and I had to reassure her. “I hear a version of that sentiment at least once I week,” I said. In fact, I hear it so often that I once wrote a parody of Hop on Pop<\/em>\u00a0<\/em>in honor of all the moms we know. It’s called Glom on Mom: Or, What Dr. Seuss Should Have Told Expectant Mothers About Life with Toddlers<\/em><\/strong>.\u00a0
\nI\u00a0won’t burden you with the whole thing, but it was a very fun writing exercise, based on the format of\u00a0Hop on Pop<\/em>, which helps kids learn to read by presenting simple rhyming words and then providing sentences that use those words in both straightforward and tongue-in-cheek ways. For example, a few lines from Hop on Pop<\/em>:<\/p>\n

UP
\nPUP
\nPup is up.<\/p>\n

CUP
\nPUP
\nPup in cup.<\/p>\n

PUP
\nCUP
\nCup on pup.<\/p>\n

MOUSE
\nHOUSE
\nMouse on house.<\/p>\n

HOUSE
\nMOUSE
\nHouse on mouse.<\/p>\n

And<\/p>\n

DAY
\nPLAY
\nWe play all day.<\/p>\n

NIGHT
\nFIGHT
\nWe fight all night.
\nEven if you haven’t read the book, you get the picture. (Excerpts from Hop on Pop: The Simplest Seuss for\u00a0Youngest Use<\/em>\u00a0by Dr. Seuss, published by Random House.)
\nFor all those mothers of toddlers who are struggling to get a moment or two to themselves, and for those booksellers who love them,\u00a0here’s my version:\u00a0Glom on Mom.<\/em>
\nTOT
\nHOT
\nThe tot is hot.
\nJUICE
\nLOOSE
\nThe juice is loose.
\nSTORE
\nFLOOR
\nMORE
\nThe juice fell on the floor.
\nThe juice is all over the store.
\nIt was just a cup, but feels like more.
\nMOP
\nSOP
\nPLOP
\nWill the mop sop baby’s plop?
\nSTICKY
\nLICKY
\nBaby is sticky.
\nBaby’s fingers are licky.
\nLOOK
\nBOOK
\nNOOK
\nOh, look!
\nBaby’s found a book!
\nBaby and her sticky fingers are hiding in a nook!
\nMAMA
\nDRAMA
\nWhere is Mama?
\nIf she doesn’t\u00a0find baby, there will be drama!
\nGLOM
\nMOM
\nTots like to glom,
\nto glom on Mom.
\nTots glom on and on and on.
\nPOP
\nTOP
\nSTOP
\nSHOP
\nTot, pop your top.
\nDo not stop.
\nScream while Mommy tries to shop.
\nCHILD
\nRILED
\nMILD
\nWILD
\nSMILED
\nBEGUILED
\nThis child is riled.
\nOnce mild, now wild.
\nRemember when she smiled, beguiled?
\nNAP
\nSNAP
\nPlease take\u00a0a nap
\nor\u00a0Mommy will snap.
\nRUN
\nONE
\nFUN
\nANYONE
\nTot likes to run!
\nDown aisle one!
\nIt’s fun!
\nCan anyone catch him? Anyone?
\n[More antics ensue, and then, at last:]
\nSTORY
\nSNORE-Y
\nThat gentle\u00a0story
\nmade baby snore-y.
\nASLEEP
\nPEEP
\nToddler’s asleep.
\nNot a peep.
\nKISS
\nMISS
\nTHIS
\nBLISS
\nMom and Pop give tot a kiss.
\nWhen tot grows up, they’ll miss this bliss.
\nBABY
\nMAYBE
\nShould they have another baby?
\nMaybe!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

An ode to mothers of small children, with apologies to Dr. Seuss’s ‘Hop on Pop.’<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-25187","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25187","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=25187"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25187\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=25187"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=25187"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.publishersweekly.com\/blogs\/shelftalker\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=25187"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}