The next great American novelist?

If you were either excited or dismayed at the news that Justin Bieber is publishing a memoir, just wait and see how you feel when you digest the news that Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi of MTV’s Jersey Shore will publish a novel in January 2011 with Simon & Schuster’s Gallery Press imprint.

The novel, tentatively titled A Shore Thing–ugh?  double-ugh? double-ugh full on, all the way?–will trace  the plight of “a girl looking for love on the boardwalk (one full of big hair, dark tans, and fights galore),” according to a press release.

It’s worth noting, too, that Polizzi told Cathy Horyn in the New York Times that she had only read two books in her life, Twilight and Dear John.

As to the quality of Polizzi’s novel, one can’t be certain, but one thing’s for shore–it’ll sell a lot of copies.